Do I really want to hurt you?

Most people who've met me and probably the majority of people who know me, even quite well, would say I am a nice person. "Oh, Summer, she's so nice", they would probably tell you if you asked them what I was like. This, however, isn't really true. Under the facade of niceness (I do realize that isn't a real work but it is so apropos), there lies evil.

The reason that my depravity isn't obvious is because it rests in my thoughts. I have thoughts that would curdle fresh milk. For example, if you are obese and smoking a cigarette and I pass by you, you wouldn't know that I am thinking "Why not use a gun, it would be faster". Or if I am in Walmart and I pass a person with some missing teeth, then I'll think "Betcha they know the directions to the trailer park." I am sure other nice, normal people don't think such things, do they?

Even if benevolent public does succumb to the odd mean thought, do most self-respecting, kind people try to put curses on others who have wronged them? I am no witch but I will do my very best to project negativity and ill will towards those who I've crossed me. For example, the co-worker who always made be feel unwelcome and earnestly tried to have me removed so that he could re-exert his questionable 'power', I focused all the foul karma I hope to possess on having it downpour on his wedding day and his entire honeymoon. Or hoping my former company would go bankrupt so that those who treated me poorly would be jobless and never recover. Does the fact these curses netted no result take away from my malevolent intent?

I think that my true nefarious nature lies in this one fact: I think that I am better than everybody. Umm, wasn't it thinking he was better than God that caused Lucifer to become Master of All That Is Evil?

Yep, I am starting to think that I have a problem here because I think that I am better than Satan too.